Emotionally challenged in everyday life

Although painful conditions such as lipoedema or lymphoedema are not themselves mental illnesses, their impact on the quality of life has enormous consequences for the mental health of those affected, as they can develop into psychological complaints.

Connection between stress and pain

The link between an increased perception of pain and stress is now well documented. Even if stress is not the primary cause of the development of lipoedema or lymphoedema, stress is one of the factors that maintain the pain.

The result is a vicious circle of pain and discomfort: The perception of pain is intensified by stress. Pain becomes discomfort. Discomfort becomes more stress. More stress becomes more pain. And more pain turns into withdrawal, shame & self-criticism, resulting in more stress and more suffering.

The internal pressure of suffering is also high

But it is not only external factors that affect the psychological stability of lipoedema and lymphoedema sufferers. Long-held beliefs, so-called intra-psychological factors are not visible to the outside world, but trigger enormous stress in those affected. The constant repetition and effect of these beliefs puts a long-term strain on the inner system on a physiological level. Beliefs can be, for example

‘I have to be thin to be loved.’ or ‘I have to achieve a lot to be accepted.’

Those affected by lipoedema and lymphoedema face the great challenge of accepting themselves and their body despite all the symptoms. What is already difficult for healthy people usually proves to be an almost insurmountable hurdle for sufferers in view of the pain and restrictions. As the majority of those affected also suffer from an increase in fat cells, which leads to visible physical changes, they also face social judgement in the form of devaluation.

Psychology as support for those affected

Lifestyle changes play a major role in the treatment of visible symptoms of oedema. From a medical point of view, these primarily include Consistent change in dietary behaviour, intensity of exercise, but also stress reduction in everyday life and the wearing of compression stockings.

On a psychological level, behavioural medicine provides helpful support. It aims to encourage affected people to implement the behavioural and therapeutic recommendations and maintain them in the long term. The aim is to Improvement of the symptoms and in reducing the potential for deterioration over time. Psychological or psychotherapeutic support can also help to identify and improve individual stress factors. At the same time Stress reduction and suitable relaxation techniques learnt. Both are good tools for promoting resources and increasing stress tolerance.

In concrete terms: How I help my patients

Now let's change perspective for an intensive look inwards: I want to take you with me on an excursion into my own practical experience and with my patients. One of the most frequent questions I have encountered in the course of my therapeutic work is ...

‘How can I learn to love and accept myself?’

The question of self-acceptance, i.e. the awareness of accepting oneself, is a form of our self-perception. As this is very closely linked to our self-esteem, it is a mutually dependent process: Working on how you feel about yourself is the same as working on your self-worth. If this changes, it automatically influences your entire self-perception. This self-perception in turn has a significant influence on how much acceptance you show yourself.

Sounds quite simple, doesn't it?

Almost, because self-worth is not about a big task that is completed once and then your self-worth is built up. It's about the everyday little things and experiences in life in which you attribute value to your own self. And also about changes in your own perception.

I would like to encourage you to take the path to self-worth yourself. Take time every day to listen to yourself. Ask yourself questions about your well-being and get a feel for where you currently stand with your self-care. I am happy to help you with a few introductory questions.

Questions about self-care: How are you feeling?

Focussing on your own self-care is a challenge, especially in the hustle and bustle of everyday life. With a few questions about habits and routines, we want to find out some initial clues about self-worth:

  • Question about physical self-care

    How much exercise do you do every day?
    How much water do you drink daily?
    How do you look after your skin?
    How do you ensure a comfortable sleep routine?
    Do you get enough sleep?
    Do you use sleep-promoting rituals?

Questions about psychological self-care

  • What are you doing to feel comfortable with yourself in a way that suits you today?
  • Are you worth taking time for the things that make you happy?
  • Have you ever taken time to find out what is good for you?
  • Do you like reading?
  • Do you like art exhibitions or attending a painting class yourself?
  • Or do you prefer music and a bath followed by ‘beauty time’?

Full commitment to your needs

Knowing yourself and your own needs is a key factor when it comes to building self-esteem and self-care. Only those who know themselves can stand up for themselves. The prerequisite is, of course, to recognise, understand and get to know your own physiological and psychological needs and the associated emotions.

Helpful image: A medal with two sides

I would like to give you an image from my psychotherapeutic work: Imagine you are wearing a necklace, like a medal.

On one side there is a YES and on the other a NO.

Which side points to whom? If you say YES to others, the NO side points to you. So you are saying NO to yourself.

Now go inside yourself and ask yourself: How does it feel to say NO to yourself? And how does it feel to do this over and over again?

If the YES side points towards you, then the NO side points outwards. How does it feel to say YES to yourself? YES to your needs? YES to your value, YES to YOUR OWN SELF VALUE?

Meet yourself with help

It is understandable that your experiences have made you feel angry, sad or ashamed. Because even if Although lipoedema and lymphoedema are not mental illnesses, they can develop into self-esteem problems. The probability is particularly high if a negative self-image already exists before the illness. This can result in mental illnesses such as depression, anxiety disorders, addiction and sleep disorders.

Psychotherapeutic support can help you, to understand and accept your feelings, identify and address the underlying issues. Because acceptance does not mean helplessly submitting to the illness. This would only result in even more dissatisfaction and self-esteem problems. This is what dealing with the illness is all about, find the balance between what you can change and what you cannot change and therefore have to accept.

The way in which you deal with yourself and allow yourself to be supported and helped in the way that is possible and good for you is the key to success. your path to self-worth and self-care.

About the expert:

Nina Lejeune is a psychotherapist from Düsseldorf and is passionate about psychophysiological education and support for her clients. As an experienced psychologist and psychological psychotherapist, she specialises in the treatment of trauma-related disorders and stress disorders. However, her work goes far beyond traditional therapy: as a certified yoga teacher and through numerous further training courses, she imparts in-depth knowledge about the nervous system and its influence on the entire body. Her expertise ranges from relieving pain and gastrointestinal problems to dizziness, feelings of being overwhelmed and various bodily discomforts. With great passion and commitment, Nina helps her patients to understand complex medical interrelationships and improve their health holistically.

More at www.ninalejeune.de